Posts Tagged ‘new year’

This 2017…

I pray that you will have a blessed, wonderful year ahead. May you continue to dream big with the Lord and allow His mighty presence to fill your hearts and home with joy this new year. May you grow and bloom in faith and be filled with a burning passion to do good and be better than you once were.

Sometime this year, I hope you commit to a scary goal and with the boldest of courage, dare to achieve it. When things do not go as planned, may you discover and realize how beautifully mysterious and amazing God’s plan is, and with blind faith and trust learn to fully embrace it. Wherever you may find yourself this year, may it be at the peak of happiness and success or at the depth of grief, despair, or sorrow, may this thought always remain with you: no matter what happens, life is good. God is good. He loves you.????????????

Dear You

I hope your 2016 will be filled with love, light, and laughter…and a little bit of passion, a little bit of madness. Dream as only you can this new year. You have 365 days to make it happen this 2016. Live every minute of it. Don’t just take chances, embrace them. Don’t just grab opportunities, seize them. Don’t just chase dreams, single-mindedly go after each and everyone one of them. And, whereever you may find yourself this year, make sure to be all there. I tell you, you will be hurt again but then you will be affirmed many times over as well. I am pretty sure you will lose again but you will be blessed in many ways too. When things get tough, hang on tight, and just remember, everything is ready in the plan of God. No need to worry ’cause the Lord’s plan is as always nothing short of great. Be happy. Love fiercely. And sometime this year, surprise yourself once again. Happy new year to us!

Chronicles of a Reluctant Widow #20: 2015, I’m Ready For You!

While I was scrolling through my instagram newsfeed a while ago, a post from one of the celebrities I followed there caught my attention. I guess it was meant to excite and send positive vibes this new year but it had a different effect on me. It caused my hair to stand on end. It reads: 2013 was practice. 2014 was warm-up. 2015 is game time. If you know me very well, you would understand why I had that kind of reaction to that post.

As much as I want to act all brave and positive about 2015, about the future, sometimes fear still grips my heart. Some days the memories of what we’ve been through the past 3 years still knock the wind out of me. I still wait with bated breath for the next big hurdle that life will throw our way and when nothing comes, I would let out a big sigh of relief. I used to chide myself for thinking this way but eventually I learned to allow myself to worry, be scared, and be stressed about the future because I am no God. I am no superwoman. I am not invincible. I am not indestructible. I get weak. I get shattered. I get hurt. A lot.

Fact is, I need God to strengthen me, keep me whole, and free me from all these paralyzing feelings. When I am blinded by fear, hurt, and worries, I see God more clearly. When I am in one of these states, I feel God’s love and blessings more strongly. For me 2013 and 2014 were both the same, they were full of grace. 2015 wouldn’t be any different. I shall welcome both the good and the bad of it with open arms, for I know either way, the Lord will not be far from my side and from my sight. It is not being positive or negative about the new year, it is being FAITH-full about the future.

With Joy and Thanksgiving, Goodbye 2013!

I am sending 2013 off to history with a twinge of sadness as with every ending as well as with quiet jubilation like most beginnings. Almost everyone I know can’t wait for it to end not because it has been so bad but because we all want a fresh start.

I have nothing but good memories and recollections of 2013. If there’s anything I learned from this year, it is that miracles do come true. This year, I had one too many, one of the most amazing of which was our surprise trip this year. Who would have thought that my daughter and I will be given a chance to go on an all expense paid trip for two with full accomodation and pocket money to Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia last February. And to top it all off, strut my stuff and walk the runaway like a supermodel for one night. To think that all I asked from the Lord was just a funny and happy Valentine? The Lord had given me that and a lot more. He showed me how He can bring me to places with the talent He has blessed me with. And He made me feel beautiful in the most cherished way.

2013 may be a year of challenges, the most trying of which for me was when my daughter was diagnosed with pappilary carcinoma. But, it is also a year where I witnessed how generosity sprang forth from the hearts of many, overflowing and amazing in its glory. The Yolanda victims can attest to this and would know from their hearts when I say that, God will indeed provide. I only asked for little but He gave me so much more. In the darkest time of our life, I saw Him clearly and brightly in the faces of the many friends, family, colleagues and even strangers who have supported us, spiritually, emotionally and financially, so my Bianca will be well again. I felt His guiding hand as He led me to the right places and the right people whom He had entrusted to perform His miracle. Even to this day, I still cannot believe that I was (and still am continuosly) blessed abundantly with the goodness of the Lord.

2013 opened my eyes to the reality also that angels do exist. Yes, they do. They take the form of friends, family, and strangers. They are everywhere, waiting for the perfect oppurtunity to extend help and to make us feel better with their presence. Most often, they don’t realize it but they have become God’s instrument to make us realize that despite what we are going through we are never ever alone. On our end, we should always allow them to do what they have been destined to do in our life.

Yearly, I would dictate my list to the Lord. The things I want to happen, things I plan to happen in my life. When Nan, my husband, died a year ago, I stopped doing that. It is because when he died, I felt so lost. For the first time I didn’t know what I want, I didn’t know where I want to go. I cannot see far into the future. I just simply followed where the Lord led me. And my God, He led me to places far beyond my wildest dreams. He gave me so many opportunities to grow in faith, grace, strength, and love. And I know that this 2014, I need not ask, for He would do the same. I trust that He knows exactly the desires of my heart and would work accordingly. But then, wether He give them or not doesn’t matter anymore, for I have learned to humbly submit myself to His Will. After everything that has happened, I believe with all my heart that His Will is always always what is best for us.

And so I end 2013, with joy and thanksgiving and welcome 2014 with great anticipation for what is to come. And as I await the coming year, I have only one thing to say to the Lord, it is that: Lord, surprise me. I am ready.

New Year’s Resolutions and Why They Don’t Work

Ever since I was a kid, I always make New Year’s resolutions which I would not be able to keep. It is part of the New Year ritual like jumping up and down when the clock strikes twelve or wearing red polka-dotted shirt or dress to (sigh!) attract money in the coming year. The favorite line during a lull in a conversation after the new year funfare for a while there is, “So, what’s your new year’s resolution?!” In the pre-school where I used to teach and even now in the big school where I am now teaching, writing down one’s New Year’s resolutions is part of the back to school classroom activity.

Over the years, I noticed that people’s New Year’s resolutions are most often things that they detested to do but got to do that is why these New Year’s resolutions usually die out faster than a virus being exposed to the heat of the sun. That is also the reason why these people (me included) easily falls in to that trap of  I can’t do it coz its soooo hard to do crap. Take the case of these following new year’s resolutions:

1. I will quit smoking (If you’re a chain smoker, the thought of not havin’ that fix will completely freak you out and the more you would stuff your mouth with those cigarettes)

2. I will not fight with my wife/husband or sometimes boyfriend/girlfriend. (It is like getting a knife and slitting your own wrist. That suppressed anger will definitely give you a heart attack)

3. I will go on a diet. (if you put this in your new year’s resolution list, every food that you will lay your eyes on would beacon you to go taste and stuff them in your mouth)

4. I will go to the gym often. (believe me, every step towards that gym would be so heavy that you would believe that you really are not feeling well for that workout)

5. I will not shop so much. ( If you’re a girl and you love to shop and you put this on your list, you will be forever depressed)

6. I will forgive those who have hurt me and forget about it. (The thing about pain, it goes away with time. You cannot just force yourself to be fine with something that you feel just isn’t right that fast)

7. I will save up my money.(and forever feel sad for not buying that favorite book or that smashing outfit or that little surprise for your loved one)

And I’m sure there are a lot more new year’s resolutions that we tend to make with good intentions but were not able to keep because they’re just so unattainable. Last year, I scrap new year’s resolutions in my mind and replace it with little goals for myself. I definitely don’t have a timetable for them. I told myself I’ll just find time over the year to do it. No pressure on my part at all. My little goals were things that I would like to do but haven’t really gotten around to doing. And instead of forcing myself into changing my bad habits, I put in my list of little goals, things that would make me feel happy and proud of myself. As I was reviewing my list, I was surprised to see that I was able to do most of them like keeping a journal (I did it thru this blog), getting back to my scoliosis work-up and exercises, controlling my temper, getting my finances in order, giving my husband some slack (hehehe), eat healthy food, consult with my doctor often and be more creative in my teaching etc. etc.

Our new year’s resolutions don’t work out most of the time because we put a set the bar too high and force ourselves to reach it. Most often they are  also the negative things that we truly hate that is why we are not motivated to do it.  Also, these New Year’s resolution that we force ourselves to do are even vague to us that we tend to question its whole point. Change do not happen quickly but gradually. When making resolutions remember to focus on the positive and make them clear and specific to you. We can restate the previous new year’s resolution into the following:

1.   I will smoke half a pack a day instead of the usual 1 pack.

2.   I will let off steam only after listening to his/her side.

3.   I will eat five small meals a day or will treat myself to 2 slices of cake a week instead of the usual 2 whole ones.

4.    I will do 15 minutes treadmill, 50 counts crunches and lift say 3 sets of weights a day.

5.    I will be a smart shopper.

6.   I will see the good in everyone.

7.  I will deposit 500 in my account every pay day.

Remember, make little goals that won’t deprive you of anything and will make you feel good and proud of yourself. Goals that are positive, clear and specific work best instead of the usual New Year’s resolutions that we have been used to that only last as long as the last embers of the fireworks die. Happy New Year everyone.:)