“Humble yourselves before the Lord and He will raise you up.”
I remember clearly the day the Lord took Nan away. When I arrived at the emergency room in Asian and took one look at him, I knew in my heart that he’s not going to make it. But I was adamant then. In my mind I bargained, pleaded and demanded God for a mircale. I wanted Him to give me back my Nan. Told Him I wouldn’t want it any other way. But then as always love will always be greater than your fear and so even if it was hard, even if it was painful, I finally gave in and silently, fearfully prayed, thy will be done. Next thing I knew the doctor was beside me, telling me that we just lost Nan. That was the first time I humbled myself before the Lord. Second time was when I was seeking treatment for Bianca. The mother in me had a growing suspicion already that it was what I feared the most especially when all tests seemed to be pointing to it. But a lot of people were praying that it be otherwise, they were storming heavens with their prayers. But then, instead of asking Him what I think will be easy for me, for Bianca, for everyone, even if it was hard, even if it was again painful, I asked Him to give Bianca what He deemed best for her. Doctors later confirmed it to be cancer. Humbling ourselves before Lord can be really tough. It takes a lot from us to be humble especially in our prayers because sometimes it is not easy to understand God’s wisdom right away when He gives us His answers. But then I learned, based from all my experiences that, though humbling ourselves before the the Lord can leave us vulnerable and open to heartaches, we still shouldn’t be afraid to do so because it also make us ready for the outpouring of blessings and the avalanche of miracles from heaven that will surely come when we, with all humility, surrender to His will.